What to Expect from Introductory Conversations

In last week’s blog post I mentioned some of the struggles that there can be in the search to find a new counsellor. A part of that search might include an introductory conversation of some kind. Most clinicians do offer a 15 or 20 minute complimentary conversation so that you can figure out whether or not you are a good fit to work with one another, and since we know your relationship with your therapist is a very key factor in counselling success and making change, it is important you can get a feel for how the work might go! I would highly recommend beginning your counselling relationship with an introductory conversation if you have the opportunity to do so. 

One of the things I often hear from clients who are new to the counselling process, or who have done multiple introductory conversations, is that it can be painful to share over and over what is bringing them to therapy. This is a person you have just met, and you may have minimal trust with them. Perhaps your past experiences with therapy have gone poorly, and you are reaching out for the first time after a longer pause from the work. I think these are real and genuine concerns, and certainly as a clinician I do not want a potential client feeling like they have to divulge highly personal information upon the first time meeting unless they really want to do so. 

The idea of telling your story over and over, can be exhausting. Not to mention, if it is a traumatic story, there is a risk of re-traumatization. Ideally a trauma-informed therapist will be aware of this, and will invite you to slow-down or pause so that safety and stability in the relationship can start to be formed and maintained. It is also important that your story receives the time and attention it deserves, which is extremely difficult to do in 20 minutes. 

So what can a person expect from an introductory conversation? 

You might be wondering, what can I do or what can I say to get a feel for the counsellor, without divulging too much personal information if I wish to stay a bit more private?

I will say I definitely think of these conversations as getting-to-know each other better. I expect that the person looking for counselling services is actually interviewing me, and getting to know whether or not I am someone they would like to speak with further. I often will begin the conversation by asking if the person has any questions they would like to ask me, or if they would prefer to tell me a bit about what brought them to therapy. Either option is fine with me, and I am happy to help guide the conversation either way. 

If you are thinking yes, actually, I would like to ask the potential therapist some questions… here are a list of questions you might want to draw from: 

Have you worked with people who are experiencing ________ before? 

What brought you to counselling work, and what do you most enjoy about the work you do?

What is your typical approach to treating _______?

Have you gone to therapy yourself, and is that important to you?

Do you tend to take the lead in session, or are you more likely for the client to take the lead and decide what they want to discuss that day?

Do you have experience working with people of my cultural background?

What approach do you take to trauma therapy? Or, couples therapy? Whatever it is you are looking for… 

Do you tend to take a more solution-focused type of approach to treatment, or do you work to explore past situations that might be contributing to the issues I am experiencing today?

Ultimately, I think it is super courageous and brave to reach out to prospective therapists, start the conversation, and see if this might be a supportive relationship to have in your life right now.

If you are feeling like I might be someone you’d like to have this conversation with, I would welcome you to book an introductory conversation through the link here. 

As always, take good care of yourself.